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Friday, September 26

Phone Angst ~ Fiction Friday

It is time once again for Friday Fiction, this week hosted by Joanne at her An Open Book blog. This was another entry in the FaithWriters Weekly Challenge. If you would like to read more great fiction, or participate, please go to Fiction Friday. I hope you enjoy the story.


“Back in 1876 an ol’ boy named Bell
Invented a contraption that we know so well
By the 1950’s, they were in everybody’s home
That crazy little thing we call the telephone
Now there’s one on every corner, in the back of every bar
You can get one in your briefcase, on a plane or in your car
So tell me why, haven’t I heard from you
Tell me why, haven’t I heard from you
Darlin’, honey, what is your excuse
Why haven’t I heard from you…”

Ugh, thought Brandy turning off the radio, the frustration she felt showing in her body language. The last thing I need is to hear Reba singing about her phone not ringing – like someone would ever not call her. She picked up her cell and dialed her best friend Kellie.

“Hi” answered Kellie, knowing it was Brandy. “Whatcha up to?”

“Oh, not much, just sitting here stewing. He still hasn’t called. We went out three days ago and I thought we had a good time. Ugh, why hasn’t he called, and why can’t I call him?” Brandy knew it sounded like she was whining, but she didn’t care.

“Brandy, you know how it is. If you call a guy, it looks like you’re desperate. And you’re not desperate, and if you are, well, you shouldn’t show it, you’re only 22 for pity’s sake! Besides, you shouldn’t be waiting by the phone anyway, go out, have fun and forget about him. If he doesn’t call it’s his loss, not yours”, said Kellie, talking in a way only a best friend could.

“I’m not desperate! And I’m not ‘waiting by the phone’. It’s a cell, so it goes with me. Duh! I just thought we both had, you know, fun. I guess maybe I had more fun than he did”, said Brandy sounding dejected.

“No, I’m sure he probably had just as much fun as you. That’s probably why he hasn’t called. He’s just scared ‘cause he likes you. You know that’s how guys are. He’s just being stupid!”

“Yeah,” responded Brandy, “just like in high school. Boys are mean and stupid! Stupid boys not calling, stupid phone not ringing, stupid second date not having! And why did that Bell guy have to invent the phone anyway?”

“That doesn’t even make sense, you know. Besides if Bell didn’t invent the phone we wouldn’t be talking right now,” said Kellie laughing.

“I know, but that’s how I feel. I swear, I’m so done with guys. Maybe I’ll just become a nun, and I’ll marry God and never have to worry about dating or the phone ringing again,” Brandy said with frustration in her voice.

“I hate to break this to you, but you’re Methodist, not Catholic,” said Kellie. “And besides, then you couldn’t wear makeup, or those strappy heels you love so much, and you really look awful in black, it just washes you out. Why don’t you come over tonight and we can watch a movie and do some fun male-bashing together.”

“Yeah, ok… uh, hold on, my other line is beeping,” said Brandy switching lines.


“Hey Kel,” said Brandy happily. “I’m so excited, that’s him on the other line. We’re going out again tonight. I gotta go, ok?”

“Wait!” Kellie responded with force. “I thought we were hanging out tonight? You know, just us girls?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot. But he’s so cute and cool and fun and I really like him! You understand right?” Brandy asked.

“Yeah, I understand. Boys are for now, friends are for always. I get it.” Kellie tried to sound like she was supportive, but really she was bummed. She’s so boy crazy, Kellie thought. Stupid boy, stupid phone, stupid second date! Now what am I going to do?

‘Ok, thanks! I gotta go, he’s on the other line. I just love the phone and that Bell guy that invented it! Bye!” Brandy gushed as she clicked over, leaving Kellie looking blankly at the disconnected phone in her hand.

© 2008 Tracy Keck

Author’s Note:

Song: Why Haven’t I Heard From You
Written by: Sandy Knox and T.W. Hale
Sung by: Reba McEntire


Darlene said...

This is good. I like that song...Reba is one of my favorites. I also like how you put that friends are for always. I don't know what I do with out my friends. This includes blog friends. they encourage, pray and call me just when I need them.
Thanks for being a friend...
Have a fabulous weekend!

Betsy Markman said...

Great characterization! I feel like I've met them before. Good job.

Tamela's Place said...

Great story, I remember those days!

Good Job!

AnooCre8ion said...

Good writing Tracy, very natural.

Have a great weekend.

The Surrendered Scribe said...

What a familiar story, sums up my earlier years. Good job!

Love the new blog look!

Joanne Sher said...

Great characterization, and super job with the dialog, Tracy! I also like your blog look :)Enjoyed this!

LauraLee Shaw said...

This is excellent, Tracy. Your characters were very real (and familar too), and I was engaged throughout the whole story. It's always a treat to come over here.

Terri Tiffany said...

Hey Tracy-- how true this story is!! Good dialogue:) If you get a chance and want a writing tip, email me about dialogue tags. :))