A Sacrifice of Praise

Therefore, let us offer through Jesus a continual sacrifice of praise to God, proclaiming our allegiance to his name. ~ Hebrews 13:15 (NLT)


Have you ever made a sacrifice of praise? I thought I had, until the time came that I really knew I had. It seems like such a simple act, to praise God, and really it is. But this particular Scripture makes reference to a sacrifice of praise. A sacrifice.


The thing about a sacrifice is that there is cost involved. Think about it. If we can easily, even glibly, do something without giving it much thought or consideration, it is not a sacrifice. If we throw $20 into the offering plate and we still have plenty left over to pay the bills, go to lunch, buy a new purse or pair of shoes, and hit Starbucks a few times, then we’ve given an offering, but not a sacrifice. On the other hand, if we use the money we’ve been saving for our annual vacation (or whatever), to help a family who has lost everything in a fire (or something else), that is a sacrifice.


A sacrifice is not always the easy or pleasant thing to do, but it is the right thing to do. A good parent will sacrifice their own wants and desires to provide for and take care of their family. Most of us would even go so far as to sacrifice our own life, if it were to protect or save the life of a loved one. And of course we have the amazing example of Jesus, who came as the Lamb of God, to be sacrificed, in order to reconcile us to God.


A sacrifice of praise comes from a broken heart or a shattered spirit. It is not given without pain, because to praise in the midst of sorrow is a sacrifice. To choose, or will yourself, to rise up above the circumstances that are pulling you down, and praise the Living God, no matter what, is a sacrifice. When you are feeling crushed by the heaviness of grief, or are being mercilessly battered by the storms of life, and you choose to believe, to say, “Nevertheless, God is good,” you are offering a sacrifice of praise.


The first time I offered to God a sacrifice of praise was after my first miscarriage. I was hurting and I was angry. And I didn’t understand why I lost the baby it took me so long to conceive in the first place. For a while I went through the motions, but that’s all they were. I’d go to church, and was present in body for worship, but not in spirit.


Then one day during worship, I stood, and I bowed my head, and I began to cry. In that moment, I spoke to God, telling Him, “All I have to offer is my pain and anger, but if you want it, I give it to you.” And then I began praising Him for who He is. It wasn’t easy, and it wasn’t full of energy and life, but I did it. I remembered that God is good, even in my grief. I gave him a sacrifice of praise.


When worship was over, I was changed. No, the pain wasn’t magically all gone, but I felt the peace and love of God. I found that when I praised God in spite of my hurt, it strengthened me. I was able to experience the loving comfort of my Abba Father. Since that time, I’ve had other occasions to offer up a sacrifice of praise, and every single time, God has met me there, and comforted me.


Giving a sacrifice of praise during a time of sorrow isn’t easy, but it is important. Not for God, not to stroke His ego, but for us. It is through our sacrifice that we are able to let go of the pain and begin to truly heal. God longs to comfort us when we are hurting, but He is a Gentleman, and will not force Himself on us. He is there though, waiting for us to allow Him to. And it is only then, when we are willing, that He can give us beauty for ashes.


Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. ~ Matt. 5:4 (NKJV)

You're With Me, Lord ~ Psalm 139, Pt. 2

I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence! If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there. If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans, even there your hand will guide me and your strength will support me. I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night— but even in darkness I cannot hide from you. To you the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to you. ~ Psalm 139:7-12


Isn’t it good to know we are never alone? Though undoubtedly we may feel that way at times, the truth is that we are not. The thing is the Bible doesn’t ever say we’ll never experience the darkness, storms, sorrow, pain, betrayal, cruelty, evil or death. What it says, is that when we experience these things, God is right there with us.


Have you ever tried to flee the presence of the Lord? Times when you’re angry, doing something you know is sinful, wanting things your way and in your timing, or simply retreating into yourself? I have. It seems like the times that I need Him the most, are the times that I push Him away. Much like a petulant or pouty child. Nevertheless, He is always there for me. He is always waiting on me. He is always reaching out to me.


Have you ever felt as if God has abandoned you, that when you reach out to Him, He’s just not there? I have. There are times when the darkness is so dark and the storm is so violent that you feel you’ll never make it out, you feel like you won’t survive. You even wonder, where is God in the midst of it all? But we can’t rely on or trust our feelings. They are fluid, constantly changing, and influenced by our own limited and faulty perceptions. Feelings waver, truth does not!


The truth is that no matter what we feel, God is right there. Whether we are choosing to live righteously or in sin, whether we are joyful or heartbroken, content or dissatisfied, running to or from Him, He is always there. He supports us when we are frail and uplifts us when we fall. He strengthens us when we are weak and guides us when we are lost. However, we have to let Him. We can, and sometimes do, choose to turn Him down. But that doesn’t mean He’s not there – He is. The darkness may last for a time, but the Light always pushes it back. Weeping may endure for the night, but joy comes in the morning. (Psa. 30:5)


I am so grateful that I don’t have to rely on my own strength, knowledge, wisdom or feelings. To think that the Lord of all creation is always with little ol’ me, no matter where I am, what I’m doing, or who I’m with, is too wonderful for words! Yes, the storms come and the waves crash down, but we don’t have to be overcome by them. We can trust in the Truth, rather than our feelings, and lean on the support and strength of Jesus to get us through. That’s what He wants. That’s what He offers. All we have to do is receive it.


Thank you Lord, for always being with me, no matter what I’m going through. Thank you for offering me your love, mercy, grace, compassion, comfort, patience, strength and support. Thank you for driving out the darkness and showering me in Light. Thank you the hope and abundant life you have for me. You are everything to me and I praise you!

Deeply Honored ~ No Foolin'

WOW! I am truly humbled and honored today. I have been notified that Seed Thoughts has been chosen as the Blog of the Month for Christian Women Online. To be honest with you, I’m a bit overwhelmed by this, since it is my understanding that there are over 4,000 blogs on the CWO blog roll.


I am constantly in awe of the way that God has been leading me in my writing and that He allows me to do this. I know He has given me a gift for writing, but without His purpose, that gift wouldn’t get used meaningfully, if at all. It is always my desire to honor and glorify Him in my writing.


This is especially meaningful for me this month, since it is officially my one year blogiversary. It has been a delightful journey. In addition to my words, I’ve shared my laughter, my tears, my goals, my struggles, my achievements, my failures, my sorrow, my joy, my heart, and my love for my family and Jesus. In return I’ve received healing, comfort, freedom, encouragement, wonderful words of wisdom from others . . . and friends.


The friends have been amazing. I have “met” people I never would have otherwise met and am truly honored to “know” them. They have inspired me, taught me, and accepted me, warts and all. (By the way, the warts are figurative – I ain’t been kissin’ no frogs!) It amazes me that I can feel such a connection with so many people online.


To those of you who’ve been with me for a while, and some of you have even been with me since the beginning, I’d like to thank you. Thank you for coming back to read time after time. Thank you for your encouraging comments. Thank you for inspiring me, challenging me, blessing me and teaching me. Thank you for putting up with all of my blog-changes, the look, the content, the adding and subtracting, etc. Most of all, thank you for the gift of your friendship!


To those of you, who are new to Seed Thoughts, thank you for stopping by. I really do appreciate it. I hope you enjoy your visit here, and come back often. There is a plethora of content because I just have too much going on in my brain to narrow it down. :-) In reality though, in all that I do and write, I strive to be real and relevant, and point others to Jesus. Because that is what He has called me to do. This is more than just an outlet for me. It is my ministry and I am honored that I get to do it. I know that any words I offer that inspire, uplift or encourage others, are actually from my Father – I am simply a tool He chooses to use.


“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,” says the LORD. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts. For as the rain comes down, and the snow from heaven, and do not return there, but water the earth, and make it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower and bread to the eater, So shall My word be that goes forth from My mouth; it shall not return to Me void, but it shall accomplish what I please, and it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it.” ~ Isaiah 55:8-11

My Great Epiphany!

Ok, so I mentioned on my Facebook page the other day, that I had an epiphany, but didn’t elaborate at the time. I guess people really do read all those blurbs, because I’ve had several people mention it since, both in person and through e-communication. So, I’ve decided to go ahead and divulge this great “Ah-ha” moment that I had.


Many of you know from reading this blog over the last year that I didn’t come from a close or healthy family. I’ve divulged much of my testimony in various posts throughout the year. But for those of you who may not know, I grew up in poverty and a single-mom household that was dysfunctional. My mother has a lot of . . . issues. Depression, hopelessness and a victim-mentality rule her life. I experienced hunger and humiliation, emotional and sexual abuse, and neglect. My growing up years were based on survival and as such, I was fiercely independent and headstrong. In many ways, I was more like the parent of the household, for myself, my little brother and my mother.


Obviously we are not a close-knit family. Even to this day we are not close. I try to honor my mother as best as I can, but her choice has been to remain distant from my life. I love her, and I pray for her, but I have strong and healthy boundaries, and will not allow myself to get sucked into the drama and dysfunction that I once knew. And I feel good about my life and know that God is ok with it too. What remains is in His hands. My mother gives what she can, which is very little, but now I can accept that, and further I'm happy for that.


The summer before my senior year, I signed up for the Air Force in delayed enlistment. Within two weeks of my graduation, I was off to basic training. I was thrilled and excited and full of fear too! When I left, I said a quick goodbye, with a quicker hug, to my mother and turned to face my new life. Then I noticed something. Others, guys and gals, who were making the same journey, were holding onto their families tightly and crying. I was shocked and confused by this. I just didn’t get it. It never occurred to me to cry, that this might be a sad or lonely thing. As far as I was concerned, it was an exciting new adventure and I was free!


Through the years since, I’ve seen this type of thing many times. I’ve seen tears at saying goodbye to and missing family, a longing to be together, through the good and the bad, talking to parents and siblings often on the phone, and getting together for holidays and even just because. I came to realize that that was “normal,” and I was not. I still didn’t get it, and I didn’t understand it, but I accepted it. My normal was independence, distance and friends – not family. In fact, I held tight to my belief in family by choice, not by chance, meaning my friends and pets were my family, not those I was blood related to.


Fast forward to now and my recent epiphany. We were watching The Biggest Loser the other night and the remaining contestants all got to go home for the week. It was touching and emotional and just… nice. When it was time for them to go back to the ranch though, it was so clear how hard this was for many people – especially the moms who had to say goodbye to their children. I was incredibly moved by these scenes.


I began thinking about how would I handle a separation like that from my beloved husband and precious daughter? Just thinking about it made me cry. Literally. And that was it! That was my great epiphany! I realized then that I had made it to “normal.” All of a sudden, I got it. And I realized once again, the amazing faithfulness of God. He took my deepest longing to have a family that I loved fiercely and enjoyed too, and He gave it to me! I realized that He gave me an Eph. 3:20 family, that He gave me beauty for ashes, and He restored all that the locust had stolen. And I was, and am, so very grateful! Thank you, Jesus!


“Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us.” ~ Ephesians 3:20

A Joyful Noise

One of the things I like to do as a new mom is sing to my daughter. Of course there’s lots of nursery rhymes and lullabies, but that’s not all. Sometimes I sing silly little songs that I make up along the way. Sometimes I’ll sing along with the radio or CD. What it is doesn’t seem to matter too much to her. She just likes it. I sing, we dance, she laughs. Life just doesn’t get much better than that!

I love to sing and I love music. All kinds of music. (I am an 80’s girl after all!) If you were to take a look at the playlists on my Ipod, you’d find a little bit of a lot of things. I get bored very easily if I stick to only one genre of music. And when my music is going, I’m usually singing along. Often times, I’m singing along LOUDLY. There’s only one problem. I don’t sing well and I don’t have a good voice. I guess that’s technically two problems, but I digress.

There’ve been many times that I’ve thought, “It’s not fair! Why do I love to sing so much if I’m not good at it?” I’ve had to come to terms with the fact that I’ll never be on the worship team at church and no matter how much I want to, I’ll never have a voice like Martina McBride. I’m sure that I’m not the only one who’s ever wanted (ok let’s be honest here, coveted) someone else’s gift or talent. For a long time, I just sort of dismissed any gift or talent that I had, like it was unimportant or irrelevant. For instance, I knew I could write, but so what? Lots of people can write and besides no one sees it but me. Or so I thought.

When I became a Christian, God started working on me. He had a lot to do. He not only had to help me change into a better version of the person I was, but He had to help me change the way I saw myself too. He showed me that He created me uniquely, with my own gifts and talents. He also showed me that those gifts and talents were not just for me, and that if I did not share them, as He intended, then I was in effect rejecting them. It was an amazing revelation for me! He created me, with specific gifts and talents, to become a wholly unique individual with an intended purpose that nobody but me could fulfill. Wow!

So now, here I am, writing for the glory of God. It is my hope and my prayer that the words I write will touch, encourage or otherwise help the reader. As I have begun this journey of writing publicly, I take very seriously the responsibility God has entrusted to me. I know that if I will stay out of His way, by not pushing my own agenda, I will fulfill the purpose He has set before me. To me, this is an act of worship and praise. And in writing, I know my voice is pretty good.

As far as singing goes, well I guess I’ll just keep doing what comes naturally. I will make a joyful noise and be comfortable in knowing that to God and to Reagan, that’s just fine.

“Make a joyful noise to the Lord, all you lands! Serve the Lord with gladness! Come before His presence with singing! Know (perceive, recognize, and understand with approval) that the Lord is God! It is He Who has made us, not we ourselves [and we are His]! We are His people and the sheep of His pasture. Enter into His gates with thanksgiving and a thank offering and into His courts with praise! Be thankful and say so to Him, bless and affectionately praise His name! For the Lord is good; His mercy and loving-kindness are everlasting, His faithfulness and truth endure to all generations.” Psalm 100